[Ashley]

Could you post a link to technique you’re talking about?

[Ashley]

I’ve come from that Social Chameleon back ground. Wanting to be liked by everyone and I’m still learning to express my boundaries and needs when it means confronting someone. When I recognised this, I had some fear about going too far the other way and becoming a loose arsehole who just doesn’t give a shit. Neither seem favourable to me so I asked myself a question.

Who do I want to be? – Something that combines both. I want to be truthful and express my boundaries, but in a way that comes from love and understanding.

So I’m not going to tell someone they’re a complete fuck up to their face, but I may point out how the way they are being is affecting me and these are my boundaries. I try to see everyone as going through their own shit just as I am so I’m not going to judge them.

I’d recommend as Jimmy said; “Who do you want to be in these moments?” Get in tune with that version of you and align with it as much as you can in each moment.

[Ashley]

Ok so I’m on Meetup and have two groups who would be a great fit for this dance. I haven’t had any ticket sales yet but I think this is where engagement comes in, I need engagement to get engagement and this is where I could be stronger.

I’ve been around to local alternative shops and cafes, with leaflets. everyone I speak to is interested but nothing firm yet. I’m not sure if this is because it’s still a month away and so not really in their mind just yet and by engaging with the event pages on facebook and meetup this will keep it in mind.

I know what I’ve got to do now I think, facing the little fears that come up is My personal challenge, for example, I have a video of Me moving/dancing to a few tracks that I could post to the event pages, but there is some fear there holding Me back; fear of being judged probably. I know I should just post it anyway, and I will, but ideally I’d like to find a way to build up to it (or feel excited to post it as I have turned fear into excitement before).

I have a few other ideas as well; sample song, competition, video talking about the dance, quotes, poll, interview but I have some fear about doing this here too, I know in the next few days I have to just do something so I will, but for now I’m trying to feel into that fear and understand it’s roots (I realise this may be a delay tactic which is why I’ll do it anyway in the next few days regardless).

[Ashley]

Thanks Andrew, some great suggestions. I’m implementing these ideas now. I’m also going to make sure I update the facebook events page with extra information, videos and a few other bits along the way too. Hopefully this will get Me some signups.

[Ashley]

Thanks for replying Nathan! I’ll get on these suggestions. Just one question, what do You mean by forming a relationship with these businesses, what does that entail?

[Ashley]

Ok so the things I’m still learning to incorporate into My life:

1) Building a social group. – I spent much of My 20’s alone or with people who were nice but I didn’t feel connected to. I’m putting Myself out there much more now, but I’m still finding My way. Trying to figure out what I want to do with people and finding people who can make the time to do things too. It’s been challenging in a city where people have so much time with work so I may need to find people with more time.

2) Becoming a better coach. I’ve come a long way since I first started CoachingOS but there’s always room for refinements, so any feed back always appreciated!

3) I’m also exploring other areas of personality that I may have kept hidden due to fear of expressing Myself fully in the past. Things like humour, can still be dependent on who I’m around so I know I have more focus control work.

4) Brotherhood. I’ve always got on well with Women but in the past I didn’t feel particularly masculine, more like a boy still. Masculine Men made that version of Ashley feel anxious. However, I feel now more in My Masculinity, I feel comfortable with who I am and able to be around Men who are in their Hearts and in their Power.

5) How to make a success of the location dependent events I’m running and create more of a location independent life.

[Ashley]

After reading Your new article about conversations is got Me thinking about flirting. I’d love to read an article on the LifeOS way of flirting.

[Ashley]

I’ve dealt with it in the same way as Leigh, create a life where You can do what You want when You want.

As for how to deal with it when You have a job You’re committed to… find balance? Take time to also chill, relax, wind down or move jobs, create a life where You have as much chill time as You want (may require radical life changes). I don’t have much experience with burn-out but that’s what I did to create space for the things I want to do that helps Me stay fresh.

[Ashley]

Anonymous wrote:

“I read how the elites are trying to depopulate, polluting the food , created a controlling economic system etc This did seem bad, so, I didn’t want to contribute to their system.”

Can You control this?
So what can You do that aligns with Your core values?
– Can You choose a path that is more giving and in alignment with Your values?
– Can You share information with others and inspire them through the way You live Your life?
What would You like to do?
(You mentioned Healer, Shaman, Working with Consciousness – have You explored these?)

“Sometimes, it makes me wonder If life is really this bad .with many being treated like a slave . I didn’t want to live life like a slave .I need more time for things that matter too( like more time with self , creating more meaningful relationship etc) So, mostly, I don’t want to spend all the time making money ………”

This is similar to Ashley 1.0’s experience. Feeling lost, trapped and disillusioned with the 9 to 5, the selfishness of people to get what they want at the expense of Others, the lack of care for the planet and Other people through feeding misinformation on food and nutrition etc.

Did this focus serve Me, or help to wake Me up and kick My butt into gear?

Where is Your focus?
– Is it on what Others are doing, or on what You can do?

What can You do for You for You that is giving You time and nourishes Your future growth to being free of the trading all of Your time for money scenario?
– What can You start doing now that You would love to do and could be a source of income in the future while being in alignment with Your values?

Take Your time to work through some of these questions and continue to explore and identify what You feel. Don’t judge what comes up, just observe it and follow Your Highest Excitement.

[Ashley]

Anonymous wrote:

“I read how the elites are trying to depopulate, polluting the food , created a controlling economic system etc This did seem bad, so, I didn’t want to contribute to their system.”

Can You control this?
So what can You do that aligns with Your core values?
– Can You choose a path that is more giving and in alignment with Your values?
– Can You share information with others and inspire them through the way You live Your life?
What would You like to do?
(You mentioned Healer, Shaman, Working with Consciousness – have You explored these?)

“Sometimes, it makes me wonder If life is really this bad .with many being treated like a slave . I didn’t want to live life like a slave .I need more time for things that matter too( like more time with self , creating more meaningful relationship etc) So, mostly, I don’t want to spend all the time making money ………”

This is similar to Ashley 1.0’s experience. Feeling lost, trapped and disillusioned with the 9 to 5, the selfishness of people to get what they want at the expense of Others, the lack of care for the planet and Other people through feeding misinformation on food and nutrition etc.

Did this focus serve Me, or help to wake Me up and kick My butt into gear?

Where is Your focus?
– Is it on what Others are doing, or on what You can do?

What can You do for You for You that is giving You time and nourishes Your future growth to being free of the trading all of Your time for money scenario?
– What can You start doing now that You would love to do and could be a source of income in the future while being in alignment with Your values?

Take Your time to work through some of these questions and continue to explore and identify what You feel. Don’t judge what comes up, just observe it and follow Your Highest Excitement.

[Author]

Replies